How to Rewire Limiting Beliefs and Build New Thought Loops
If last week’s blog helped you see the thought loops that have been running your life, this week we’re taking it one step further — it’s time to rewrite them.
Today, we’re talking about what to do when the affirmations feel too far out of reach, how to hold both truth and hope, and how to use the Catch, Challenge, Change framework to rewire those limiting beliefs once and for all. I’m also giving four real-life examples of beliefs women in their 30s and 40s often struggle with — from body confidence to comparison to rest — and learn how to shift them toward growth, compassion, and possibility. Because this work isn’t about pretending everything’s fine. It’s about telling yourself a truer story. One that leads to peace, purpose, and self-trust again.
✨ In this blog:
How to Catch your limiting beliefs in the moment
How to Challenge the false stories you’ve been rehearsing
How to Change your thought loops with realistic, grounded affirmations
What it means to hold both reality and hope
Examples of how to reframe the most common negative beliefs
LET’S DIVE IN 🖤
Hey friend — welcome back to The SELF CARE Sisterhood.
If you tuned in last week, we talked about those sneaky thought loops that start running in the background — the ones that sound like truth because we’ve thought them so many times. We called it “catching the loop before it catches you.”
And if you started noticing your own loops this week — first of all, I’m proud of you. That awareness work is uncomfortable but it’s powerful.
When I did my own Q4 audit recently — which, by the way, is inside that free Own Your Eight Fall Audit workbook linked in the show notes — I realized how loud my thoughts had gotten without me even noticing. Things like:
”The best is behind you.”
“You’ll never get back to her.”
“You can’t do both.”
I had to physically write them down to see them clearly — to name what was actually driving my behavior and my mood. And that’s when it hit me:
You can’t change what you’re not willing to name.
So today, we’re going to go there. We’re going to talk about what comes next — what to do once you’ve caught your loops. Because awareness is the doorway, right, but walking through it and doing something about it? That’s where the real transformation happens.
WHY “THINK POSITIVE” DOESN’T WORK
Here’s the thing no one tells you about mindset work — it’s not about pretending everything is okay.
There’s this pressure in personal development to “just be positive,” or to repeat affirmations until you believe them. But if your brain is screaming, “This isn’t true,” you’re not healing — you’re just layering toxic positivity over real pain and that’s not what I want to do here today. Most affirmations you find a embedded in this reality which is why “just think positive” doesn’t work.
When I talk about affirmations, they aren’t a magic wand you wave over your life and it changes. They’re tools that help you take steps towards your best and highest self— and they only work when they’re believable enough to your nervous system to start laying a new track.
Because when your body doesn’t believe the new story yet, it resists. You might even notice tension, resistance, eye rolls. That’s your body saying, “This isn’t safe. We don’t believe this yet.”
So instead of faking it, let’s use what I call bridge beliefs — thoughts that are rooted in truth, but angled toward hope.
It’s not “I love my body” bc that might feel fake and untrue in your current reality.
It’s “I’m learning to take better care of my body” bc this takes us towards the hope and agency of what you can control.
You’re giving your brain a baby step — a thought it can begin to believe.
Because real mindset work holds both: reality and hope.
THE METHOD – CATCH → CHALLENGE → CHOOSE
I wan to teach you a process I use in my own life that helps so so much. It’s simple, but it works: Catch. Challenge. Choose.
CATCH – The first step is awareness. When you notice a thought, don’t judge it. Just catch it. Write it down.
Half the time, the thoughts that run us are subconscious. They feel like background noise — like air conditioning — until we bring them to the surface.
CHALLENGE – Next, ask: “Is this actually true? Or is it just familiar?”
Familiarity breeds comfort — and our brains would rather stay in a familiar lie than risk the discomfort of growth.
CHOOSE – Finally, choose a new loop. Not one that feels fake — one that feels possible.
You’re literally creating a new neural pathway. Think of it like cutting a new trail through tall grass — it feels awkward and unnatural at first, but the more you walk it, the clearer it gets.
I know it helps to have a tangible example, so let’s practice this together with a few common thought loops I hear over and over from women in their 30s and 40s — including ones I’ve had myself.
EXAMPLES OF NEW LOOPS IN YOUR LIFE:
LOOP #1 – “I’ll never feel confident in my body again.”
Let’s start with one that hits deep.
“I’ll never feel confident in my body again.”
Maybe your body looks different than it used to — you’ve had kids, you’ve weathered stress, hormones have shifted, metabolism has slowed — and the reflection in the mirror doesn’t line up with the woman you remember being. And it’s easy to mourn that. To grieve a season when it all felt easier.
But here’s what’s true: confidence isn’t something you have because of how your body looks. It’s something you build through how you treat your body.
Your body has carried you through every hard thing. Every pivot. Every disappointment. Every comeback. She’s still showing up for you.
So what if the new loop sounded like:
→ “I’m learning how to feel strong and confident in this version of me.”
Notice that word — learning. It leaves room for growth, compassion, and process. It’s not a lie; it’s a new truth in progress.
LOOP #2 – “I’m not doing enough.”
This one? Whew. It’s the anthem of women everywhere. We are living in an age of chronic “not enough-ness.”
You can be working full-time, raising kids, showing up for your people, cooking, cleaning, managing mental load — and still, that voice whispers:
“You should be doing more.”
Here’s what’s wild: that belief doesn’t motivate — it drains. It disconnects you from gratitude and tricks you into chasing worth instead of walking in it.
Let’s challenge it. Is it true that you’re not doing enough? Or is it that you’ve been measuring “enough” by someone else’s standards Because enough might look like doing less but being present. Enough might mean choosing rest over rushing. Enough might mean protecting what matters most — your peace.
New loop:
→ “I’m doing what matters most right now.”
That’s a phrase your nervous system can breathe with. It’s grounded. It’s true. And it honors the fact that capacity changes with every season — and that’s okay.
LOOP #3 – “Rest is lazy.”
This one goes deep, especially for women raised to be helpers, achievers, or caretakers.
Rest has been painted as something you earn — a reward at the finish line.
But rest isn’t lazy. Rest is maintenance. Rest is sacred.
Think about it: your phone needs to recharge, your car needs fuel, your plants need darkness as much as light — and yet we act like we can run endlessly without refilling.
So when you catch yourself saying, “Rest is lazy,” try this:
→ “Rest is productive for what actually matters.”
Because true rest isn’t the absence of doing — it’s the presence of being. When you rest, your creativity resets. Your hormones balance. Your heart softens. And that’s where sustainable success is built — not in burnout, but in rhythm.
LOOP #4 – “I’ll never be as ___ as her.”
Ahh, comparison. The thief of joy, the killer of peace.
You scroll, you see her house, her body, her highlight reel — and that quiet voice says, “You’ll never be as ___ as her.”
But here’s what I’ve learned — comparison always hides context. You don’t see her bills, her tears, her prayers, her behind-the-scenes. You’re comparing your becoming to her middle.
So when that loop starts to play, pause and remind yourself:
→ “Her story can inspire me, but my path is my own.”
Because someone else’s shine doesn’t dull yours. And when you stop comparing, you get your energy back to actually build the life you want — not the one you think you should want.
Alright, friend — before we close, I want you to remember this simple framework that’s been such a game-changer for me:
Catch. Challenge. Change.
✨ Catch the thought — start noticing the loops that play on repeat. Awareness is where the power begins. You can’t change what you don’t see.
✨ Challenge the thought — pause and ask, “Is this actually true? Is this helpful? Is this how I’d speak to someone I love?” Most of the time, those loops are just old protective patterns doing their job.
✨ Change the thought — replace it with something rooted in reality and hope. Something your heart can start to believe. Like, “I’m learning to trust where I am,” or “Rest makes me stronger.”
That’s it. Not perfection. Not pretending. Just choosing a better thought, one moment at a time.
When you do this consistently, you’re literally creating new pathways in your brain—new patterns that lead to peace instead of pressure, clarity instead of chaos.
And if you want to keep this reflection going, don’t forget to grab your Own Your Eight Fall Audit workbook (the freebie I’ve been talking about all month). It’s the same practice that helped me see the thought loops I’d been carrying without realizing it—and start rewriting them with intention. You can find it linked in the show note.
You are not your thoughts, friend. You are the thinker of them. And that means you have power. Power to pause, power to rewrite, and power to create a life that feels aligned to your best and highest self.
You’ve got this. One thought at a time. One loop at a time. I’ll see you right here, next week, on The Self Care Sisterhood Podcast. 🤍
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